As defined by the English dictionary, “Anger” is a strong feeling of displeasure, hostility or antagonism towards someone or something, usually combined with an urge to harm. When angry, you can do unimaginable things without you knowing. As part of this, anger can destroy our daily affairs, jobs, well-being and our relationships.

Anger comes in a combination of your thoughts, feelings and behaviours when you’re severely frustrated by unfortunate conditions and maybe by people’s unfair behaviour. When you get angry, you say/do things out of control, not knowing that you’re negatively harming the next person.


If you ask yourself what anger has cost you, I believe two or three sentences will be made. Has there ever been a time in your life when you got angry and ended up hurting someone you care about? In the aftermath of feeling mad, i.e when you’ve calmed down, it’s often easy to know the damages you’ve done or the ‘unfriendly outspoken words’ you’ve uttered uncontrollably.

In a relationship, there are visible, tangible signs: tears on the face of your partner (mostly with the ladies), a heavy silence hanging in the air after a loud shouting time and also bringing quarrels or so. Anger can also cause problems in your life that perhaps aren’t so easy to spot right away. This inspired me to do this research about how anger negatively affect your life and the lives of those around you.

If you can’t control anger, that means there are chances that you’re might be hurting someone’s feelings or other people’s life around you. If you ever feel really angry and unable to let something go, if you feel like you’re continually on the edge, when your anger lasts for extended periods of time, it becomes more difficult to cope with little aggravations in your life and it becomes harder to de-stress.

As it might interest you, uncontrolled anger can adversely affect your health life, thereby causing headaches, migraines, chest pains, some body aches and more. Over the long term, anger issues can further complicate pre-existing health conditions. It can also put you at risk for hypertension, high blood pressure and depression for stressed thoughts.

In other words, your anger can affect not only you, but the people in your life as well. It casts a negative feeling on those around you. Your anger can cause people to feel upset, intimidated, afraid, or a handful of other unpleasant emotions. You’re also running the risk of pushing loved ones out of your life for good.

When you yell at your partner when you’re angry, whether it is emotional or physical, it can have an extremely negative effect on your partner’s well-being. Solving conflict with anger, yelling and violence also sets an unhealthy precedent in a relationship, by doing what your emotions tells you to do under the influence of anger.
These are some of the ways anger affects you.


This is something that has been a problem to me before, not until I worked out plans to get rid of it.
Now, let’s take a look at the step-by-step ways I think anger can be controlled below;

STEP 1: Try Calm Yourself a little 

First of all, when you’re angry, stumbling upon some things that didn’t come out as planned for you and maybe a friend/partner or neighbour tries to talk to you, either in a good or bad manner, don’t over-react, try calm yourself down and simply say thank you and leave, even though you must have said something ‘huge’ as part of the shouts, it doesn’t really mean though as it can be solved in the other steps below.

STEP 2: Go to a Lonely Environment and rest

After calming yourself a little, change environment by taking a walk to a lonely place set aside for just you, and maybe the birds and nature. Try rest there for some time. Don’t go to a neighbour/friend’s house because they might advice you wrongly thereby causing more negative behaviour and attitude. This is true because I’ve learnt that some people can easily be negatively advised to pick a step that they will later regret without them knowing and re-thinking. These set of people are gullible and easily persuaded to do something. Even in this my article, they won’t bother doing a re-think of some other possible ways, rather, they’ll just stick to it. Always have a re-think!

STEP 3: Think of the Situation on Ground

When alone, think of the situation and how it happened, think of what you might have done or said rudely to people around you and realise your mistakes that “even in bad times we should still be responsible and mature enough to handle issues that annoys us and not by getting angry for no reason at people for their opinion whether good or bad”

STEP 4: Make amend and live a more meaningful life

After stumbling on it, go back home/office and make amend. Maybe you said things out of control or did something unlawful, go make apologies to those parties. Life wouldn’t have been better should we have not had a merciful God who always forgives. Apology is one thing that is cherished so much by people because it tells your ingenuity, maturity, honesty and straightforwardness. Knowing and admitting you’ve made a mistake somewhere and it needs to be corrected is really a good thing and makes you a mature person.

STEP 5: Practice a New life without Anger

As you’ve set the pace, let it begin. Start living a new life of controllable anger even when it might come some times. Also, try keeping yourself out of things that will make you angry, especially in a relationship, family or work place, by disregarding any attempt of temptations that you might have out of spoken words or behaviour/reactions.

I’ll leave you today with an inspiring line that; “It takes only a mature and responsible mind to fight against anger”, so if you’re the type that do get angry at every little thing that comes your way, dearest, it’s either you’re a kid that can’t handle issues or you’re learning to grow up. Always live without bearing grudges because grudges because grudge is a key to anger, it makes you not to forget what has happened.


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